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Five Annoying Species of People in the Delhi Metro

Being a regular Metro traveler for a while, and a victim of the sheer boredom that inevitably leads to the observation of the commuters (I know, I need to get a life), I’ve come to draw categories of the kinds of people you come across in Delhi metro every day. And I can bet my ‘Harry Potter’ collection that you can relate to all of them.

The “Snow White’s Moms”

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Remember “Mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest one of all?” by Snow White’s stepmom? Well, we do get the modern versions of that character on our metro. There are these people who just have to flick their luscious mane in front of that transparent door, in order to attain that perfect casual look, not giving a damn whether they’re elbowing their neighbors or stuffing their hair in others’ mouths! A tad bit annoying, if you’re at the receiving end of it.

The “Imma-gonna-create-my-own-seat” types

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Okay, the second kind of crazy: the ones who use their suitcase or bag packs or even the goddamn floor to sit on and conveniently block the way in the train. They have this ‘I don’t care about the scowls you people give me’ attitude. Honestly, it’s the worst kind of swagger. What’s worse is that sometimes they strategically place themselves on places where they get the straight chilly waves of the air conditioner! Talk about desperation.

The “Starers”

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A term I just coined, but you get the drift, right? This is the most popular breed of irksome humans we have in the metro. They just stare (*creep alert*). At anything. Anything they get their eyes on. Everything. And I’m not gonna be sexist and say that only men do it but they’re beaten at this game by the aunties who scan your ENTIRE profile like you’re a cosmo magazine and give you the judgemental looks.

The “Amplifiers”

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People literally yelling over the phone, wailing babies, people cribbing over their boyfriend/girlfriend (loudly), constitute this group. ‘Nauseating’ is an understatement when you come to describe such people. No amount of scowls or stern looks can deter such people from their life goal of aggravating everyone around them.

The “Sleeping Beauties”

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Okay all kidding aside, it’s one of my genuine concerns and a source of constant displeasure – people sitting on seats (reserved or not) and pretending to be asleep and not offering the seats to people who REALLY need it.

They can gush over cute babies, but not get up so that the woman holding that infant can sit; they can feel sorry for physically challenged, or aged individuals but will not offer seats to them, not until they’re prodded to do so.

These are some of the most prominent sorts of people you encounter every day in the Delhi metro. The only sane ones, I feel, are the readers, WhatsApp and Facebook users, music lovers and me – the only ideal metro companions you can ever find!

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