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16 Hilariously Sarcastic Quotes That You Can Use In Your Daily Life

I am sure there are times when you wanna look cool by saying those hilariously sarcastic quotes. Take a look at 16 hilariously sarcastic quotes that you can use in your daily life.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

 

I hate when I am about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.

 

Strong people don’t put others down. They lift them up and slam them on the ground for maximum damage.

 

If you see me smiling it’s because I’m thinking of doing something evil or naughty. If you see me laughing it’s because I’ve already done it.

 

When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.

 

Why is it everything I love is either unhealthy, addicting or has multiple restraining orders against me?

 

Best friends: Ready to die for each other, but will fight to the death over the last slice of pizza.

 

People say money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you had enough money, you can have a key made.

 

Never break someone’s heart because they have only one inside…break their bones because they have 206 of them.

 

I love what you’ve done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of the nostrils like that?

 

If you don’t drink, smoke or do drugs you may live long enough to be a real burden to loved ones. Please pass the wine.

 

The light at the end of the tunnel – are the front lights of a train.

 

Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile on your face when pushed down the stairs…

 

One day you will meet someone so amazing in every way who will want absolutely nothing to do with you.

 

The difference between true love and dinosaurs: We’re sure that dinosaurs once existed on this earth.

 

Nobody is interested in your sorrow unless you can make a joke or a poem out of it.

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